Before Students Can Thrive, They Need to Belong - Message from Coach Kitty Smith

Before Students Can Thrive, They Need to Belong

Why community is essential to learning.

By Kitty Smith | Educator, Youth Advocate & Be Kind 5 Volunteer Coach

I spent thirteen years in public education working with young people from all walks of life. I taught middle school, supported multilingual learners, mentored students, and helped develop educational programs designed to meet the diverse needs of students. Throughout those years, I learned something that no curriculum, assessment, or instructional framework could ever fully capture: Before students can thrive academically, they need to know they belong.

I have worked with brilliant students who struggled to complete assignments, creative students who rarely participated in class, and young people whose behavior communicated far more about their unmet needs than their academic abilities. I have also watched students become more engaged, confident, and willing to take risks when they felt connected to their school communities.

As educators, we spend considerable time discussing academic achievement, student engagement, graduation rates, and college readiness. We examine data, adopt new curricula, and develop interventions to improve student outcomes. But how often do we stop to ask a more fundamental question? Does this student feel like they belong here?

Belonging Begins with Human Connection

School belonging is the feeling of being accepted, respected, included, and supported within an educational community. It can look like having friends or enjoying school. It is also knowing that your presence matters and the people around you care about who you are beyond your academic performance.

Research supports what many educators have experienced firsthand. A 2018 meta-analysis published in Educational Psychology Review examined 51 studies involving more than 67,000 students and identified teacher support as one of the strongest predictors of school belonging (Allen et al., 2018). Think about the implications of that finding.

One of the most influential factors in whether students feel they belong is something educators can cultivate every single day: supportive human relationships. A teacher who learns a student's interests. A counselor who notices when something is wrong. A coach who celebrates progress. A classmate who makes room at the table. These interactions may seem small, but they communicate something powerful: You matter here. And sometimes, that's where learning begins.

Belonging Creates the Conditions for Learning

Think about the last time you walked into a room where you didn't know anyone. Maybe you wondered where to sit, whether you would say something embarrassing, or whether the people around you would accept you. Now imagine experiencing that uncertainty every day at school.

Students who feel disconnected may hesitate to participate, avoid asking for help, or withdraw from classroom activities. When students feel accepted and supported, they may be more willing to raise their hands, attempt challenging tasks, collaborate with peers, and persist through setbacks.

Learning requires vulnerability. To learn something new, we must acknowledge that we don't already know it. We have to be willing to make mistakes, receive feedback, ask questions, and sometimes fail before succeeding. That's much easier when we trust the people around us.

A 2020 meta-analysis examining 82 studies of secondary school students found that school belonging was positively associated with academic achievement, motivation, self-efficacy, and multiple forms of student engagement (Korpershoek et al., 2020). The findings reinforce the importance of belonging as part of a broader educational environment that supports student success.

As an educator, I came to understand that creating a supportive classroom was part of effective instruction, and it helped build a community where students could learn from one another rather than simply being measured against one another.

Belonging Matters Beyond the Classroom

The importance of belonging extends far beyond grades and classroom participation. According to the CDC's analysis of the 2021 Youth Risk Behavior Survey, only 61.5% of U.S. high school students reported feeling connected to others at school. The same study found that school connectedness was associated with a lower prevalence of several adverse experiences and health-risk behaviors, including poor mental health, substance use, and missing school because of feeling unsafe.

For students navigating trauma, family instability, discrimination, grief, or other challenges, school may be one of the few places where they experience consistent, supportive relationships. A caring adult cannot eliminate every hardship a student faces. But they can help create an environment where that student feels less alone, knows where to turn for support, and has someone willing to walk alongside them.

Creating Classrooms Where Students Truly Belong

There is an important distinction between belonging and fitting in. Fitting in asks students to change themselves to be accepted. Belonging allows students to be accepted without abandoning who they are. A multilingual student should not have to hide their home language. A student with a disability should not have to conceal their support needs. A student experiencing homelessness should not have to hide their circumstances to be treated with dignity.

Every student deserves to participate in a community where their identity, experiences, and contributions are valued. So what does that look like in practice?

It begins with building authentic relationships. Learn students' interests, strengths, and aspirations. Recognize who they are beyond their grades and behavior. Create opportunities for student voice and choice. Invite students to help shape classroom norms, contribute ideas, and make meaningful decisions about their learning. When students have ownership in their environment, they have more opportunities to experience themselves as valued members of the community.

Normalize mistakes. Create classrooms where students can ask questions, take risks, and struggle without humiliation. Academic rigor and emotional safety are not competing priorities. And perhaps most importantly, recognize the needs beneath the behaviors we see.

The student who is frequently absent, withdrawn, or struggling academically may not lack motivation. They may lack stability, resources, confidence, or connection. Rather than asking only, Why isn't this student doing the work? We might ask, What does this student need to participate, and how can we help make that possible?

Sometimes that means connecting students with academic support, counseling, healthcare, food assistance, or community resources. Sometimes it means helping them navigate systems that can be difficult to access independently. Building belonging also means teaching students that asking for help is a strength and that

communities thrive through reciprocity, care, and shared responsibility. Belonging is both a relationship and a responsibility. It is something we cultivate through our daily interactions and reinforce through the policies, practices, and cultures of our schools.

Belonging Is the Beginning

I often think about how we define success in education.We celebrate test scores, graduation rates, college acceptances, and academic awards. Those accomplishments matter. But what about the student who finally feels comfortable raising their hand? The student who starts coming to school more consistently because they know someone is happy to see them? The student who asks for help for the first time? The student who discovers that their voice has value? Those moments matter, too.

In thirteen years as an educator, I learned that students do not arrive in our classrooms as empty vessels waiting to be filled with knowledge. They arrive as whole human beings, carrying experiences, relationships, hopes, fears, strengths, and needs. Our responsibility is to create environments where students have meaningful opportunities to learn, connect, contribute, and become.

Belonging cannot replace stable housing, nutritious meals, mental health services, accessible instruction, or quality teaching. But it can strengthen the relationships that help students access those supports and participate in their own growth. And perhaps most importantly, it communicates something every young person deserves to know: You do not have to achieve something extraordinary to earn your place here. You belong because you are human.

With Gratitude,

BK5 Coach Kitty Smith

Coming Up Next: Building Belonging in the Classroom

Understanding why belonging matters is only the beginning. In my next Be Kind 5 blog, I'll share practical, research-informed strategies educators can use to foster authentic connections, strengthen classroom communities, and create learning environments where every student feels seen, valued, and empowered to thrive.

References

Allen, K., Kern, M. L., Vella-Brodrick, D., Hattie, J., & Waters, L. (2018). What schools need to know about fostering school belonging: A meta-analysis. Educational Psychology Review, 30, 1–34. What Schools Need to Know About Fostering School Belonging: a Meta-analysis | Educational Psychology Review | Springer Nature Link

Korpershoek, H., Canrinus, E. T., Fokkens-Bruinsma, M., & de Boer, H. (2020). The relationships between school belonging and students' motivational, social-emotional, behavioural, and academic outcomes in secondary education: A meta-analytic review. Research Papers in Education, 35(6), 641–680. Full article: The relationships between school belonging and students’ motivational, social-emotional, behavioural, and academic outcomes in secondary education: a meta-analytic review

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2023). School connectedness and risk behaviors and experiences among high school students—Youth Risk Behavior Survey, United States, 2021. Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report. School Connectedness and Risk Behaviors and Experiences A